Susan Cross | Author, Writer, Speaker

The Gift of Time

Tue, 25 Jan 2022 13:57:16 -0800

Scholars, artists, musicians, philosophers, and ordinary people have speculated about the meaning of time forever. It seems that time never just “is.” We tend to speak of time in terms of the future or the past.

We have too much time on our hands.

We don’t have enough time.

It happens time after time.

Can’t time just stand still?

Time is running out.

The time to act is now.

I can’t argue with any of these typical measures of time; however, I’ve learned to equate time with presence. Whether I’m thinking about the past, present, or future, I ask myself, “Was I present in each moment? Did I fully embrace the now?”

On January 30, 2017, time stopped for me when I nearly died as my appendix ruptured while traveling in the Caribbean. It was the biggest disruption of my life and the start of a hugely important personal reset, including the way I view time. I now see time as a gift of moments I can choose to immerse myself in, observe, or disregard. Time isn’t simply a checklist to tick off item by item.

My newfound attitude has taken some getting used to and lots of practice, but it’s been liberating. I feel more peaceful and less stressed. My family tells me that I’m more fun to be around. It’s as though giving up my former obsession with trying to compartmentalize time into the past and the future has paved the way for finding more joy and wonder in each moment.

Every year in January as part of my thanksgiving ritual for being alive, I reflect on how I’ve used my gift of time over the past year.

Take the Nature Challenge

Wed, 02 Jun 2021 04:00:29 -0700

Tired? Cranky? Feeling more blah-blah than rah-rah? It’s time to feel more energetic, happier, and ready to embrace each day.

Try one or more of the 25 activities below each day. Notice which ones make you feel stronger, more positive, more alert, or less stressed or anxious. Celebrate and do them often. You’ll be on your way to becoming a more positive and motivated you!

Plant herbs.
Hike or bike for 30 minutes.
Bring flowers indoors.
Train to become a volunteer trail guide with your local park system.
Visit public wilderness spaces.
Spend time near water.
Gaze at stars in the night sky.
Follow animal tracks.
Volunteer to tend an urban garden.
Grow a garden.
Play in the dirt.
Use your tech to store the sound of birds singing or water flowing.
Make nature photos your screen savers and home or lock screens.
Lay on the grass and stare at the clouds.
Go barefoot.
Eat seasonal foods grown locally. Pick them yourself when possible.
Sit by an open window or outside, close your eyes and listen to birds.
Take a deep breath every time you walk outside. Hold for 4 seconds and release. Repeat twice.
Take one nature photo a day and share with someone else.
Watch a sunrise or sunset.
Join a local walking or hiking club.
Kayak.
Volunteer to collect native seeds with your local parks or nature associations.
Go fishing.
Stop talking and listen to the natural sounds around you for 1 minute every day. Set a timer if needed.

Looking for more ideas? Visit zenvironment.life.

Let me know how your nature challenge is going!

Suspense, Drama, Intrigue, Joy

Wed, 05 May 2021 13:30:29 -0700

Remember dinner theater? I can remember a time when guests would pay to eat a gourmet dinner while a theater troupe performed on stage. It was fun to go with a group of friends and support the local arts scene without breaking the bank.

What if you could enjoy dinner theater from your own home? I’m not talking about a virtual experience. This is much, much better and it’s right outside your window. Drum roll please . . . Welcome to Nature Dinner Theater! This performance comes from the natural rare habitat of The Oak Openings Region.

Its early summer and a bluebird family, who had been nesting in a bird bottle on our house over the Spring decided it was time to teach the kids how to fly. My husband and I were sitting at the table looking out a big picture window at the backyard. Suddenly, one of the two babies fled the nest on his (or her?) first flight. We spotted the little one during dinner. He was clinging low on a tree. Mama and Daddy were hovering nearby but didn’t interfere with Baby’s first taste of freedom. Would Baby be brave enough to leave his post on the tree and take flight again?

Suddenly a large red headed woodpecker threatened as he flew close to Baby to get to a birdfeeder nearby. While the woodpecker was still in flight, the bluebird parents swooped into action and dive bombed the woodpecker. Their little one kept hopping higher and higher on the tree trunk. Would he take flight? Could he reach safety on his own?

We watched and waited. The woodpecker settled on the birdfeeder to munch. All at once the little blue bird mustered his confidence and took flight. It was clunky and awkward, but he soared for a few seconds then landed on the ground, safely covered by the undergrowth.

The baby bluebird’s parents perched on the clothesline above him protectively. He was still on the ground as we finished dinner, but we saw his Dad feed him. After filling his belly, we watched Baby try to make his way to another...Read More

Finding Your Zen: A Recipe for Natural Restoration No Matter Where You Live

Thu, 22 Apr 2021 05:00:31 -0700

Nature has been called one of the world’s best prescriptions for restoration of physical and mental health by indigenous people, scholars, theologians, scientists, and artists since the beginning of time. What the typical Rx label doesn’t tell us, however, is that the prescription isn’t just a one-time experience. With regular use, it connects us with an unlimited energy source we can count on for personal restoration every time we let ourselves become part of it.

I’m not a mental health expert, but I know from personal experience that our surroundings can play a major role in how we feel about ourselves. For me, that world is very much connected to nature. And, by working to conserve a small piece of the environment, I’ve taken some valuable steps in my own wellness journey.

I discovered the connection between mental health and nature by accident. I’m from the heart of the manufacturing Midwest – Toledo, Ohio. Now, you might not think there’s much there from a natural standpoint, but you’d be wrong. The Nature Conservancy has identified where I live as one of America’s last great places. It’s called the Oak Openings Region. It’s about 850,000 acres of sandy soil between Toledo and Detroit. That’s a little larger than the state of Rhode Island! It’s as rare as The Everglades in Florida, the temperate rain forests of the Pacific Northwest, and the Redwood Forests. 99% of the Oak Openings is developed and people don’t even realize they’re in it. The last 1% of undeveloped land is hidden in the hands of private landowners.

My husband and I felt called to restore our 20 acres of the Oak Openings. Our journey has not been a straight line, but we’ve successfully brought back many rare plants and species – some that had been considered near extinction in our area. What surprised me the most was that we didn’t have to plant many seeds. We just had to disrupt the wrong environment and give what’s supposed to be there a chance to thrive.

Let's...Read More

Live Your Every Day Extraordinary!

Sat, 30 Jan 2021 03:36:08 -0800

Today I celebrate that I am an ordinary woman enjoying an extraordinary life.

I have people to love and people who love me. My family is healthy. I’m healthy. I’m surrounded by a beautiful natural environment full of wonder and joy. Every year on this day, I celebrate that I’m still here to be my perfectly imperfect self.

My journey of rediscovery started on January 30, 2017, when I almost died after my appendix ruptured while on vacation on a remote Caribbean island. It took an army of family, friends, and strangers almost a year of loving support (and tough love) for me to heal from the outside in. I had several setbacks, but all along the way I kept hearing messages of encouragement that enabled me to reconnect with the parts of me I’d neglected.

What have I learned?

The more we love and let others love us, the more we heal our soul.
Help is always available if we just reach out.
Light always overcomes darkness, but on its own schedule.
We each have something special deep within us that the world can't destroy.
Everyone deserves to live an extraordinary life every day.

Join my celebration by giving yourself permission to recognize and live your own every day extraordinary!

Trust Your Tribe

Thu, 31 Oct 2019 12:46:19 -0700

According to dictionary.com, the word “tribe” has 11 possible definitions. A tribe is loosely defined as a group of people with common traits, interests, or experiences. The word originated in 1200, although I’m sure that tribes have been around since the beginning of time.

Today, we don’t necessarily think of ourselves as one tribe that has more similarities than differences. We’re institutionally and socially classified into so many categories, it’s hard sometimes to identify a trace of shared understanding.

I’d like to change that.

We each have a personal tribe of family, loved ones, friends, and colleagues. These are the people who respect us for who we are. They’re with us in times of celebration and failure. They inspire us to do a little more and be a better version of ourselves. They’re the ones who lead by example and do the right things, even when it’s hard or unpopular. The ones who remind us that saying “please,” “thank you,” “I was wrong,” “I’m sorry,” and “I forgive you” are not signs of weakness, but strength of character. Whether large or small, this is the tribe we rely on the most.

We also have a much wider circle made up of people who show up unannounced just because we need them. We may never know all of their names, but they exist, and they want to help. We just have to let them. Members of this tribe touch our lives in positive ways that feel like gifts because they’re unexpected.

New York Times best-selling author, Lissa Rankin, MD, talks about the health benefits of finding your tribe. She references overwhelming scientific evidence that when human beings are connected, they nourish each other, and the health of the body reflects...Read More

You Are Enough

Fri, 25 Oct 2019 10:57:57 -0700

Recently, Inc. Magazine pulled an O Magazine contribution from respected public figure Michael J. Fox – a true force for good – about life or career advice he’d give his younger self. It got me thinking, what advice would I give a younger me?

Hi Susan:

It’s me, your older self. I hope when you find this – stuck between the pages of your current favorite book, To Kill a Mockingbird – it makes you smile and doesn’t freak you out too much. Before you roll your eyes, give me a minute and read on. I know you’re confident you have all the answers about your future. Since I’ve been there already, here are a few things I wish I’d known when I was where you are now. They would have helped. A lot.

Finishing junior high will be rough. You’re not a child, although you still like to play. Your body’s changing in ways that preview the adult packaging that’s to come (which is taking some getting used to). Your friend groups are shifting. People you thought you knew have become almost like strangers. You’re constantly being asked about your future . . . how you feel about moving to a new high school . . . if you’re going to play sports . . . what kind of career you want . . . if you’re going to college . . . the list goes on and on.

Shut down the noise. Take a pause. Focus.

I know this is hard to believe right now. But trust me, you’ll see it for yourself many, many times. Some moments will be planned, and some will catch you unaware. You’ll overcome a challenge. You’ll reach a goal. You’ll make mistakes. You’ll solve a problem. You’ll get in trouble. You’ll see something clearly for the first time. You'll...Read More

6 Life Lessons from Dogs

Fri, 18 Oct 2019 12:14:26 -0700

Recently someone asked me to describe a time when I was a protégé and what that experience felt like. I’ve been fortunate because I’ve had some amazing mentors in my life. In fact, I think we can’t have enough mentors. Life is difficult and any help we can get that enables us to become our best selves should be welcomed and appreciated, even when the source is unexpected.
My best experience as a protégé, however, has come from two mentors I’ve known only since 2017. Both have taught me the same lessons, but these mentors aren’t very traditional. In fact, they’re covered in fur. They have four legs each. And, they wiggle and wag at the drop of a hat. My most recent (and best) mentors? Our family dogs: Molly and Winston, our grand-pups.
Molly is a two-year-old mixed-breed rescue. Part St. Bernard and part Lab, she looks mostly like a Lab. She has reddish brown fur and loves to scout trails, wade in shallow water, and have her belly rubbed. She’s happiest when she’s running in the woods. She’s a dedicated chaser of squirrels and chipmunks – although she hasn’t caught one yet. And, she loves everyone – she’s very popular in her Dayton, Ohio, neighborhood. Molly knows her own mind and is definitely the alpha in any pack.
Winston is a one-year-old pure-bred yellow English Lab. Winston is wise to the city because he lives in Chicago, but he has a taste of the country in his blood. He loves swimming (whether it’s Lake Michigan or a backyard pond), getting as muddy as possible, and being the center of attention. He also has never met a stick he doesn’t like. His dog walker is a college student and he often smells like the perfumes of the girls who hug him when he visits campus.
Molly and Winston have both come to stay with us for several days at a time. Our typically quiet household changes a lot when they’re here but believe me when I say that we absolutely love having them. They are pure joy and we can’t get enough of either one – muddy paws,...Read More

Finding the Very Best Something

Wed, 12 Jun 2019 18:13:08 -0700

When I took time out to attend an all-day women’s retreat, I felt a little guilty. Household chores had piled up and were calling me. It felt like I was taking time off, which I’m not used to doing. My inner voice – which I’m learning to listen to more and more – told me to go, in no uncertain terms. One of my friends was a co-host of the day and I wanted to support her. I was also giving away two of my books.
I thought I knew what to expect. We’d take a yoga class. We’d walk in the woods. We’d create art. We’d look inward and allow ourselves to reset. We’d share fellowship, sisterhood, food, and laughter. Most of all, we’d just “be.” I love those things and they all happened. And, so much more.
The retreat was called “Permission to Pause.” Over 20 women of different ages and life experiences attended. Each of us were led to the event for different reasons, but we shared the common desire to reconnect with the best parts of ourselves for the day. I knew a few of the ladies from yoga class, but most were strangers. It didn’t take long for us to become friends.
I sat at a full table during an alcohol ink painting project. I’d never used this medium before and the project matched up with my rather free flowing artistic style. As we created our art, we laughed a lot. We also got to talking about our lives outside of the retreat.
One of the young women at my table co-founded a theatre group for people of all abilities from students with special needs to seniors looking for a fun, new adventure. Inclusive theatre experiences aren’t new, but this one – based in Michigan – is nomadic. Instructors bring the theatre experience of singing, acting, and dancing to community spaces where participants conceive and perform shows. This woman, an experienced special education teacher, found that her true calling lies outside of the traditional classroom.
As I listened to her talk about her theatre company and her goals for the future, I realized...Read More

Be a Searcher and Look for Yourself

Fri, 24 May 2019 14:16:49 -0700

We're all searchers. We search for love, happiness, truth, peace, answers to life's questions. Most of the time we search outside of ourselves to find answers. I know I did. Where we really need to learn to search, however, is within. If we can only find fulfillment and answers from the outside, how can we ever live our authentic lives from the inside? Inside is the only place that we can control 100%. It's the only source of truth that is part of our soul.
When I first learned to read, our primer was filled with stories about three siblings – Sally, Dick and Jane. Two of the first words I learned in the book were "Look" and "See." To me, they represent the ultimate self-imposed challenge. We can't grow if we don't look and see the world around us AND the world within us. Seeing the outside is easy. We just have to slow down. Seeing the world from the inside is harder because we have to stop, literally, and be one with each moment.
For a short time, I stopped looking. I saw my world from the outside in rather than from the inside out. I settled for life as it was presenting itself to me and allowed myself to be lured into complacency masked as achievement. But truth be told, I became passive.
"Look" and "See" are action verbs of the highest order. And we need to heed them so that we can reclaim our right to be the best version of ourselves.
How do you look and see you for your best self?
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